Computer Diagnosis-LOL

One day, Pete complained to his friend,"My elbow
really hurts. I guess I should
see a doctor."

His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at
the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and
cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your
urine, and the computer will diagnose your problem and
tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00."

Pete figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a
jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store.

Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and
deposited the $10.00. The computer started making
some noise and various lights started flashing.

After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper,
which read: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in
warm water, avoid heavy labor. It will be better in
two weeks.

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new
technology was and how it would change medical
science forever, he began to wonder if this could be fooled.

He decided to give it a try.
He mixed together some tap water,
a stool sample from his dog,
and urine samples from his wife and daughter.
To top it off, he masturrbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the
computer, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.

The machine again made the usual noises, flashed
lights, and printed out the following analysis:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal
shampoo.

3. Your daughter is gettin' screwwed by three guys at
the same time and having urinary infection. Put her
on antibiotic and keep a track of her outings.

4. Your wife is pregnnant . . . twin girls. They
aren't yours. Get a lawyer.

5. And basstard,....... if you don't stop jerking
off, your elbow will never get better !!!!!!